


You Save my Life Everyday

by Baymax_13



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Disassociation, Established Relationship, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Injury Recovery, Insecure Zuko (Avatar), M/M, Mentions of Blood, Mentions of Nightmares, Protective Zuko (Avatar), Regret, background kataang, self-deprecating language
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-11
Updated: 2020-08-11
Packaged: 2021-03-06 11:49:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,849
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25849084
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Baymax_13/pseuds/Baymax_13
Summary: “Sokka…” She sighs. “What do you remember?”He shrugs nonchalantly. “Some assholes attacked us and I took an arrow to the shoulder. Zuko hid us out in a cave. I assume at some point we were rescued. That or I’m dead and this is a not very interesting version of the spirit realm.”Katara smooths his hair back like mom used to, and he’s struck suddenly by how grown up she is. They’ve both become adults since their world-saving adventures with the avatar, but it’s easy to forget that his little sister isn’t so little anymore.“You were bleeding out, and we weren’t expecting you back for a while, so… Zuko used firebending to cauterize the wound. It saved your life, but he’s not taking it well.” She looks away from him and Sokka is silently grateful. He doesn’t want her to see the blood drain from his face at her words.----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Or what happens when Zuko is forced to use his bending in the one way he swore he never would.
Relationships: Sokka/Zuko (Avatar)
Comments: 50
Kudos: 1170





	You Save my Life Everyday

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fanfic in this fandom, so I hope you guys enjoy it. I was literally just thinking about ways in which the other kids of bending could heal instead of just water, and I thought about fire bending being used to cauterize wounds and heat bending to lower people's fevers. For earthbending I thought they might create rock casts perfectly molded to the person, and for air I figured breath bending could be used to help people with breathing issues. 
> 
> And then my brain was like Zukka! And this happened.

It was supposed to be a simple fishing expedition. They were celebrating Aang and Katara’s engagement, and it was customary for the family of the bride to provide the food. Hakoda had offered to go but Sokka had insisted, and Zuko, like a fool, had offered to go with him.

He should’ve realized he was a walking target away from the village, known that the grudges people still held against the fire nation would find him even here. 

But he hadn’t, and now Sokka was paying the price. 

The ambush had come out of nowhere, at least 10 men descending on them from all sides. Sokka and Zuko were a well oiled fighting machine after years of late night sparring sessions and managed to knock most of them out, but one managed to shoot an arrow at Zuko’s back. 

If he had just been paying attention, compensating for his blind side like he used to - but no, he had gotten complacent, let Sokka make up for his own weaknesses…

And now - now they were in some random cave, and his boyfriend (though boyfriend sounded silly for all that Sokka was to him) was going to bleed to death if Zuko didn’t do something!

A groan brought him out of his reverie, and he inched closer to Sokka’s shivering form. Zuko tried to bend any heat there was towards them, but it was scarce in the South Pole, and he didn’t dare make fire in such close quarters. 

The arrow had pierced Sokka’s shoulder, gone straight through skin and tissue and come out the other side. Zuko had packed the wound as best as he could with scraps of his overcoat he had torn off, but the blood was still soaking through the fabric and onto the snowy cave floor. If he didn’t do something soon…

Sokka coughed, and Zuko rushed forward, cupping the side of the warrior’s face as tenderly as he was able to, terrified of hurting him more than he already was. 

“Zuko… what…” The words seemed to pain the young warrior, and so Zuko shushed him gently, running a hand through his hair that had come undone from its usual wolf tail at some point during the struggle. 

Sokka was stubborn though. Practically wheezing the words out he said, “Are you alright? They didn’t get you did they?”

Zuko’s throat closed as if someone were choking him, the pressure mounting behind his eyes with the effort of keeping the tears at bay. “I’m fine thanks to you, my love,” he said.

Sokka smiled, seemingly satisfied with that answer. “How bad is it?” he asked, swallowing against the pain.  
Zuko looked away, feeling ashamed of himself for failing to keep him safe. Sokka was everything, and Zuko… well Zuko didn’t deserve anything at all. 

“You’ve lost a lot of blood,” he said instead of getting into the details of just how badly he’d failed at what was perhaps his most important job. 

Sokka nodded. “How long do you think until someone comes looking for us?”

“A few hours still,” Zuko replied. “They attacked early.”

Sokka looked at Zuko, eyes full of love and pain and something else Zuko couldn’t identify. “I have a plan, but you’re not going to like it.”

“I’ll do anything.” It was true too. He didn’t care what the next words out of Sokka’s mouth were, if it would improve his chances of survival, Zuko would do it. 

Sokka grimaced. “You need to cauterize the wound.”

Zuko reeled back as if he had been struck. Sokka couldn’t seriously be suggesting…

“Baby, listen to me. Come back to me.” Sokka struggled to sit up, panting at the effort. “You don’t have to, ok? We’ll find another way.”

Zuko shook himself, expression both terrified and determined. “You’re right,” he whispered. “It’s the only way.”

Sokka gave him that look that Zuko knows means that he understands how hard this is going to be, for both of them, but more for Zuko. Sokka might be the one getting burned, but this is going to be nightmare fuel for the firebender for the coming months. 

It doesn’t matter though because there is no other choice, and Zuko would rather lose sleep for the rest of his life than lose Sokka. They get ready, Zuko removing the packing around the wound to discover it’s still bleeding steadily around the arrow fucking embedded in his boyfriend. Sokka takes the leather from his sword’s carrier and cuts off a section to bite down on. 

“I’m going to move you on your side, alright?” Zuko’s voice is impossibly soft, already tinged with regret. 

Sokka nods. If he’s surprised when he ends up facing Zuko he doesn’t show it, but Zuko can only assume he would’ve thought the firebender wouldn’t want to see his face while they do this. He wouldn’t blame him. Zuko is a coward after all, and this might be the thing that scares him the most. 

He breathes, thinking of his uncle - _firebending comes from the breath, nephew_ \- and grits his teeth. He reminds himself that he’s saving Sokka, that he would never hurt him if there was any other choice. 

He doesn’t believe himself. 

Sokka looks at him and tries a half smile around the strip of leather. Zuko tries to return it but is sure it must look more like a grimace than anything else. 

And then he starts. He lights only one of his fingers,and thinks about the candles Sokka lit in their bedroom for their anniversary, then firmly pushes the memory away lest it be tainted by what he’s about to do. He goes around the edge of the wound on Sokka’s front, trying desperately to ignore the muffled grunts of pain emanating from the person he loves most in the world. More even than uncle, and isn’t this just a terrible time to realize how deep his affections run? 

The smell of burning flesh hits him and Zuko feels all the air leave his lungs. He knows humans cannot exist in a vacuum, knows it would cause the body to implode yet here he is, in a vacuum, doing the one thing he swore he would never do. 

He’s burning someone he loves. Just like _him_. 

Zuko shuts down, but his body keeps going. It’s an out of body experience. Zuko himself is screaming, he is a young boy, only 13, begging his father to please, please stop. But instead of Ozai burning Zuko he is watching himself burn Sokka and it rips him up. He can feel bile rising up unbidden in his throat - except it’s not his throat, it’s Ozai’s - or is it his? He doesn’t know. Both timelines blur together as the younger Zuko watches him turn Sokka so he can burn his back too and he wants to scream! Isn’t once enough?

It’s Sokka’s scream that brings him back to himself, and it’s a rude awakening. He’s done, the wound has stopped bleeding, but now Zuko is very much in his body, yanking his hand away from Sokka as if he’s the one that’s been burned and not the other way around. He can’t blame this one on Ozai. This one was all him. 

Sokka passes out, from the pain - that Zuko caused him - or the blood loss he isn’t sure. 

Zuko listens for his breathing, much more even now than before, but he doesn’t look at him again until Appa shows up with a worried Aang and a frantic Katara. 

He doesn’t know if he’ll ever be able to look at him again. 

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sokka wakes up decidedly not where he passed out. He’s on a soft cot instead of a cave floor, and it’s warm instead of literally below freezing, but the starkest difference is the distinct lack of his jerkbending boyfriend hovering nervously over him. 

He feels ok though, which is more than he was hoping for considering that what he was hoping for was alive. His shoulder aches and he feels lightheaded, but it’s overall not terrible. Really his primary concern is still Zuko, because it’s unlike him to not turn into a mother sparrow-hen whenever Sokka is injured, and he gets injured a lot. 

He doesn’t have too much time to dwell on it though because Katara comes into the tent and promptly drops the gauze she was holding with a gasp. 

“You’re awake!” she exclaims, and her smile is enough to make him smile too. 

“I hope I didn’t miss the engagement party, even if you two do give me the oogies,” he says, and Katara laughs, though her eyes are suspiciously shiny. 

“We can postpone,” she replies instead of yelling at him about taking this seriously, which clues Sokka into just how serious it must’ve been. 

He wants to keep joking around, but the lack of Zuko is the only thing his pain-addled brain seems capable of focusing on. He doesn’t even get to ask though before Katara must see what he’s thinking about. The smile drops off her face and Sokka feels himself mirror the action. 

“Sokka…” She sighs. “What do you remember?”

He shrugs nonchalantly. “Some assholes attacked us and I took an arrow to the shoulder. Zuko hid us out in a cave. I assume at some point we were rescued. That or I’m dead and this is a not very interesting version of the spirit realm.”

Katara smooths his hair back like mom used to, and he’s struck suddenly by how grown up she is. They’ve both become adults since their world-saving adventures with the avatar, but it’s easy to forget that his little sister isn’t so little anymore. 

“You were bleeding out, and we weren’t expecting you back for a while, so… Zuko used firebending to cauterize the wound. It saved your life, but he’s not taking it well.” She looks away from him and Sokka is silently grateful. He doesn’t want her to see the blood drain from his face at her words. 

He can only imagine the thoughts that must be running through his boyfriend’s head. Zuko struggles with Ozai’s horrendous legacy on a good day, be it a glance in the mirror at the wrong angle, or a stern tone adopted during a council meeting. Sokka can only imagine what _this_ must be doing to him. 

He also knows his boyfriend, and he’s sure the idiot is staying away from him because he thinks it’s keeping Sokka safe. Which just won’t do, because Zuko has saved his life once again and he won’t just sit here while he’s off punishing himself for something that is decidedly not his fault. 

Sokka groans, moving to sit on the edge of the cot, shoulder throbbing with pain in it’s sling. Katara doesn’t even try to keep him in the tent, just helping to support his weight while they make their way to wherever the hell Zuko is. 

Which, yeah, Sokka has no clue, but his general plan is to scream his name until his boyfriend shows up and berates him for being out of bed. 

The plan works surprisingly well considering Zuko is just outside the infirmary, crouched by the door with his face in his hands, elbows pressing against his stomach. He looks miserable, but at least he’s unharmed. He starts at the approaching sibling duo, but his fire lord mask remains firmly in place. Sokka’s sure to anyone else his boyfriend would look cold, but he can see the pulsing worry behind the callous expression. 

Katara deposits Sokka’s dead weight next to the firebender and gives him a look. 

“Zuko just listen to him so I can get him back in the infirmary, yeah?” she asks.

Zuko looks away, but at Katara’s intense glare gives a little nod. She nods back, seemingly satisfied and leaves to give them some space. 

It’s quiet for a beat, which is frankly agonizing for Sokka who’s always been chatty. He fills the silence wherever he goes, and he knows it’s one of the things Zuko loves about him. He never expects Zuko to talk, he’s just happy to be in his presence. 

But this is different. They _have_ to talk about this. 

“So -” Sokka starts at the same time as Zuko whispers, “I’m sorry.”

He says it with a downtrodden gaze, and his voice feels fragile, like a harsh wind could shatter him to pieces. Sokka knows how strong Zuko is, but he is suddenly very aware that he’s never tried so hard to stay strong in front of him, not since they gained each other’s trust anyway.

He grabs Zuko’s hand with his good arm, rubbing small circles on the back with his thumb. He’s done this for Zuko every night he’s had a nightmare for months now, and even though Zuko remains gut wrenchingly sad, some of the tension does bleed out from his shoulders. 

“You have nothing to be sorry for, darling. You saved my life.” There is no doubt in Sokka’s voice either. He knows that without Zuko he would be a very frozen corpse right now. 

Zuko shakes his head anyway. “I hurt you.”

Sokka knows just denying it won’t do any good. Zuko has had many years to work on his self hatred and only a fraction of that time surrounded by people who encourage his self love. 

“Did Aang ever tell you about that time he burned Katara?” he asks instead. 

Zuko actually looks up at that, expression wide open and shocked. 

Sokka continues, “We came across a firebending master who had deserted the fire nation army. Aang hadn’t learned earthbending yet, but we figured that we might never have that opportunity again, so he started training. But you know Aang, he was overeager, which isn’t great when working with fire. He sent this circle of fire out and burned Katara’s hands. It’s actually how Katara discovered she had healing powers.” He chuckles. “I was so mad. I just threw myself at Aang. I don’t think it was either of our proudest moments. Aang swore off firebending then, and he didn’t really swear it on again until he met with that chakra master.”

Sokka brings Zuko’s hand up to his mouth and presses a soft kiss against his knuckles. He hears Zuko inhale sharply at the motion, but he doesn’t pull away. “Do you think Aang is a bad person?” Sokka asks. 

Zuko averts his gaze. “It’s different.”

“It is.” Sokka nods. “You saved my life.”

Zuko shuts his eyes so tightly Sokka can see the tight skin of his scar pull inwards painfully. Tears still manage to escape though, and he wants nothing more than to take his boyfriend into his arms comfortingly, but he gives Zuko space for now. 

“But my father -” Zuko manages to get out before a sob interrupts him. 

Sokka lets go of his hand to cup his face instead, thumb running over the scarred cheek he used to fear and now fears living without. “Your father is irrelevant. You have proven time and time again that you’re not him, that you’ll never be him. You’re a good man Zuko, you’re a good friend, and you’re an amazing boyfriend. In that cave, you did something that was incredibly hard for you so that I would be ok. I don’t want an apology darling, I want you to accept my thanks.”

Zuko looks hesitantly hopeful. It breaks Sokka’s heart because he knows his boyfriend is waiting for anger, punishment, retribution. Knows that the vulnerability he has already shown has put him on edge. He is still unused to support. He is still unused to love. 

It seems that the hope wins out though because he leans in towards Sokka. Sokka leans in too and catches any residual fear leaving his boyfriend’s face as their lips meet. For Sokka, it’s like coming home, the way their lips fit together. For Zuko, it’s like forgiveness, or no, it’s more like acceptance. It’s short and sweet. Sokka is still injured and neither party wants this moment sullied by pain. When it ends they stay slotted together, foreheads touching, visible breaths mingling in the cold. 

Eventually though Zuko takes Sokka’s good arm and wraps it around him, standing up and taking most of his boyfriend’s weight. Sokka doesn’t protest as he is helped to the infirmary, mostly because he is practically falling asleep by now - spirits he lost _a lot_ of blood - but also because he’s enjoying being pressed against Zuko, the human furnace.

Zuko lays him down on the cot and then squeezes himself in besides him. The warmth settles Sokka, and he lets out a contented sigh. This is where he belongs. 

Neither of them is under the impression that this night isn’t going to haunt them. Sokka knows he’ll be holding Zuko through nightmares for months to come, and Zuko knows he’ll be helping Sokka through a few weeks of grueling physical therapy, and probably a slew of frustrated outbursts too. 

It won’t be easy, but they’ll have each other, and right now that seems like more than enough.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you guys enjoyed this! If you did Kudos and Comments literally make my day :)


End file.
